Playing games with anti-heroes is nothing new to me, especially ones who are morally ambiguous. Yet, I don't know of any character that had ever made me more uncomfortable than a guy named Kratos. The God of War series, in a gameplay sense, are the stuff that should have driven someone like me to play them -- somebody who loves platforming, action-combat, button-mashing mayhem and exemplary production values. But the reason why I was hesitant in investing in this series was because Kratos is, in my opinion, the most apathetic jerk on the face of the video gaming planet. (Former GS reviewer Alex Navarro labeled him the same, and he used stronger language.)

Maybe it's because I haven't even played the games themselves to REALLY understand Kratos. However, I'm not in the business of psychologizing---I just want to play a fun game that has a good story with good characters. God of War, I think, may just deliver on that. And who am I to judge a game entirely on the merits of a single character? Yes, Kratos is immoral. Yes, he does things that make me cringe. But he's also a tormented soul who was once a family man. So it can be argued that Kratos, in a morbid sort of way, is a solid character with a lot of depth and believability.

Even though I question Kratos' violent character and apathy, I also ask myself this: was Gabriel Belmont so different? Was Rick Taylor of Splatterhouse any different either? What about War and Death from the Darksiders franchise? What makes them any better or holier than Kratos? All of these characters have one sad thing in common. They exist within the idealism that violence is the answer to their problems.

Although I'm well into my thirties, my gaming tastes continue to change and evolve. I guess such is the pathos of life---trying new things, taking the plunge, taking risks. My friend once told me---life without risk is a life not worth living. With risk comes reward, with accomplishment comes fulfillment. Giving things a chance and being pleasantly surprised by the result---it's what makes life worth living. Not just in video games, but in the outdoor hustle and bustly of life in general.

So, that said, I've asked my friend if I can borrow the first God of War on the PS2. Kratos may not exactly be someone I want to have lunch with on a sunny day in Long Beach, but he does deserve a chance. I'm going to be careful here as to not leapfrog through the trilogy as I did rather foolishly with Assassin's Creed---opting to play the games in order. I cannot indulge in any long-term promises that I'll become an immediate fan of God of War, but I'm willing to take the plunge in an effort to further expand my gaming perspectives.

I'll update you on my impressions in a future blog. Keep calm and game on.